THE AB (B) C TO FIND THE RIGHT PERSON:
ATTRACTION, VOCATION, CONFIRMATION, CHARACTER
Finding the “right” person among more than 7 billion people seems like a daunting task and decision. I totally understand that it can be confusing and challenging at times when it comes to dating and relationships. Finding the person you want to spend the rest of your life with often seems very challenging.
“When we saw each other, we just knew it. It was love at first sight! “
“We were only friends for years and then it suddenly sparked”
“I didn’t find him attractive at first, but when I got to know him better, I realized that he is everything I dreamed of.”
“I just knew that it would be my last first date!”
As if the way to fall in love wasn’t already spongy enough. In addition, there are a thousand different stories of how couples fell in love with each other. How do I know if I have found someone to hold on to?
I am not married yet and in the middle of the process trusting God to help me find my future partner. But I once heard someone talk about the following 4 aspects, which should help to find out whether you fit well. Of course, this is not a formula to find the right person, but it is good aspects and guidelines that have helped me to get some clarity in my dating process and to decide whether I want to continue spending time with someone or not .
HERE IS THAT FROM (B) C OF THE DATE:
ATTRACTION, VOCATION, CONFIRMATION AND CHARACTER
If you are just trying to find out if the person you are getting to know is a good fit for you, take a look at how these 4 aspects can help you:
1. Character – What is the character of the person? Do you trust their personal relationship with God? Is the person integrity? Honest? Selfless? And does she treat you with honor and respect? Do you have the same basic values? Can you trust in the character of your counterpart or do you feel as if you always have to support this person emotionally, spiritually and morally? Check and examine the character of your counterpart to be able to decide whether this person is one to whom you want to commit yourself with your heart.
2. Calling – Is your life going in a similar direction? What is your passion, what is this person’s passion and do they fit together, are they complementary or are they mutually exclusive? You don’t both have to work in the same field or be called to the same thing, but if your partner’s dream is to stop world hunger in Africa or another Third World country and it’s your testimony to the business world in New York , it would be very challenging to get that under one hat – or in a bundle. How do your vocations fit together? Do your vocations and dreams empower each other or are they mutually exclusive? God brings people together so that they can support and empower each other in what they are called to do. I believe relationships, and especially marriage, should make you better and empower you to serve God better than you could on your own.
3. Attraction: Attraction is also a really important component. She often distinguishes between a friendship and a romantic relationship. How do your personalities get along? Do you feel an attraction? Do you have fun together? Maybe you love spending time with someone, but can’t explain why you don’t feel more like friendship? Then that could be because of the attraction – you can have a good base and chemistry on a friendly level, but you can feel no romantic attraction. Attraction can develop over time, but ask yourself, “Is this person someone I would enjoy spending the rest of my life with?” Marriage is forever. Find someone with whom you can have a good time, with whom you are attracted, with whom you feel connected on a deeper level. Find someone who will make you happy and excited when you think about spending the rest of your life with them!
4. Confirmation: This is the key! Seek God and ask Him for wisdom, distinction and confirmation. Invite people you trust – mentors, family, friends, pastors, etc. – into your process and ask them for advice and wisdom. God only wants the best for us. Be open that He can show you “No-Go’s” or accept the peace He gives you if you are on the right path. God is for you! He is on your side! He will make it clear to you whether this person is good for you and is the right one for you.
I hope that AB (B) C to find the right person has given you some help and guidance. I hope these points will help you see your love life and relationships more clearly. Of course, there is no magic bullet to fall in love with someone, but these 4 points can give you a good foundation for a healthy and flourishing relationship. I know there is someone special for you! And it will be so beautiful and powerful when you find each other.